His Due
Our top story tonight, Martha Colt was found dead at her Long Island home this morning.
Trash gets thrown away sometimes. And, as in the case of Martha Colt, sometimes it gets tossed in the pool.
The actress was discovered floating face down.
She came to me last night. My door is always open for when the desperate get desperate.
Investigators say she appears to have been alone the night before and there were no signs of forced entry.
“What do you want?” I asked.
Colt began her long career with her role on the popular series, “Faust” but recently dropped off the pop culture radar after accusing the network of cheating her out of her contract.
“To be famous again,” she said. Her face was wet. She’d been crying.
Industry insiders claim she had been blackballed for publicizing her accusations.
“My associates can make that happen.”
The network as well as her family have refused to comment, however friends close to Colt say the once sought after actress has been feeling depressed as of late.
“Are you an agent?”
Colt, recently returned from rehab for her highly publicized drug addiction, retreated into her home and has been out of touch for days.
“I’m an agent of sorts.”
Police won’t say whether or not drugs were involved in the actress’s death but state at this point they are quote, “ruling nothing out.”
“Yeah, right. I’ll never see you again will I?”
Coming up after the break…
“Oh, just sign here and you and I will see each other again very soon.”
I love the idea of this piece. What do you think? Does the premise come through?
Tsk, tsk. She forgot to say ‘famous but still alive’. They never learn. I love the interspaced news report with the narration.
Nitpick – “ruling nothing out. – you forgot the end quote.
Thanks Laura for the feedback and catching the typo.
Oh, a pact with the devil!
And he did his job. She was on the news. She was famous again!
Works very well. Well done.
The intercutting of the news report is perfect, as is your grasp of the bland-yet-titillating journospeak. You pulled it off perfectly, Chris. Yes, it works!!
Interesting delivery. Does it work? Yes, and no. I think a short section like this works great. As an entire piece, it seems to build a barrier. Maybe heightening the impact of this style emphasizing the flashing between lines–like in the movies that exaggerates the switching.
I like where this is going. There might be something cool with more work on the details.
I like it. Her beginning her career on the series “Faust” was a nice touch.
This is brilliant work. Not just short, but concise. The italics work well in giving us the flashforward/back sense, and there is a distinct voice between our television commentator and what happens in creating her pact. Both are intriguing, really intriguing independent of each other, despite clearly alluding to one another and tying up so ominously in the end. In Pale Fire fashion, the last line can also be read to preceed the last line. I love that trick. This is handily my favorite #fridayflash of the week so far. I hope you submit it to a prime market. It deserves it.
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Laura Eno, Chris Chartrand and John Wiswell, Kate Sherrod aka K8E. Kate Sherrod aka K8E said: One of my favorites EVER RT @RT @ChrisChartrand: My #fridayflash "His Due" http://bit.ly/5ENVkP [...]
I like how you’ve done this, very clever. (one minor point, “long island home” twice in a row in the first two news bits)
The Faust mention was inspired, too
Thanks for catching that Maazz. Ugh! how did I miss that?
I love the structure of this piece. It was a great way to give the backstory in an interesting way. Great job!
Fiendish and stylistically it works very well. But like one of your other commentators said, across a longer piece the device would wear quickly.
“my door is always open when the desperate get desperate” is an excellent line and observation
marc
Yes, I think this worked, I really liked the device as it follows a natural thought process when we are personally involved with something reported on the news; we automatically re-interpret what they are saying with our own experience. Nicely done
)
I really liked the technique but got confused about the person (not the reporter). I may be a little dense, though, since everybody else seemed to get it. Very short pieces appeal to me and this one did.
I like the style of this, very nicely done sir
Good stuff
With the intro and the first few sentences, mentioning ‘Faust’ and all, I had it ready-packaged in my head, but I think you did a good job getting there. My only complaint would be that you laid too many clues.
Love the concept here Chris, and you delivered well in a short space. I too like the “desperate get desperate” line very much. Good work!
I enjoyed the flip-flopping very much. Very well done Chris.
Nice set up, great story. Loved the ending.
Brilliant structure to this, loved the interspersed news report. A good spin on the ‘deal with the devil/unpleasant person’ idea.
The inter-cutting of the two strands works well. That side works, though the ending when they come together might benefit from further work.
Ooops hit submit before I was finsished.
Perhaps a further, final revelation in the news report could provide something more at the close.
I loved the style you used, spacing the news with the actual dialogue. Why do people making wishes never learn to be more specific?
Great job.
I liked this piece and i thought the device worked well also. My only thought would be to make sure that each segment packs a punch. Most of the lines made me go “hmmm – ok, now we’ve learned … thus and so” – just make sure that each bit has the punch you envision in your mind. Very well done and i love the deal with the devil scenario